Wednesday, October 1, 2008

Beer, can I ever say goodbye to you?

So Here I am at my office, very excited to start weight lifting again tomorrow. I will be working rather late tonight, get a very good sleep, I am hoping I can sleep up to eight hours, and then kick off the day with a prayer of thanksgiving. I am just upbeat now that I want to go home and start working out. I feel like a child in a playground. Well, actually, this blog is not about my exercises, I am just so hooked to it that I can get back to working out in a snap like I haven't been away. This is about my love, my addiction, my craving, my thirst for a liquid called BEER...

My day began with nothing unusual happening. A couple of texts, favorite hot coffee, and an Eagles concert playing in my entertainment center. Nothing out of the extraordinary, dull life huh? Then around noon, a very close confidant talked to me about my beer binges. Appalling as this my sound, but it has taken over my life. Since April, I've really been drinking a lot. I don't want to accept the fact but deep inside I know she's right, whichever way you look at it. Basically, I don't benefit from it aside from a temporary respite from earthly problems. Beer costs money, slows down your metabolism, stops your body from burning fat, makes you dance like a fool, makes you urinate whenever you feel like it, and makes the whole world your bedroom. Is it really worth it? Don't you think it's kinda over-hyped? Yes beer in small doses actually is beneficial to the body. But I'm not the type who drinks in small doses. My confidant made me think and she really hit home when she mentioned my struggle with smoking. I am almost two years clean of cigarette and I intend to make that a lifetime. Hell, if I can quit smoking, I can surely try stop drinking. But I don't want to stop, I want to minimize drinking; to drink only in special occasions and drink sensibly. So here I am, making a vow to stop acting like a dog, and live off the alcohol.

I know this will not be easy. It is never simple to cease a connection with something or with someone. I know, I've been through a failed marriage remember? Though to compare your marriage with alcohol is quite a far analogy, the logic is there, it's about termination and conclusion of a relationship. So here I am, thinking and asking myself, can I do it? Can I? I answered: Why not?! I was able to stand up after my marriage, I was able to throw the damn cigarettes, and I was able to shed 60 lbs of fat from my body, I CAN stop alcohol from ruining my life! I will...

To jump start my journey to clean living, I made a table in excel showing my daily alcohol consumption. Everyday, I will mark the day, either CLEAR or INTOXICATED; I will also record what kind of alcoholic beverage it is, the amount, and the Reason why was I able not to drink or why was I intoxicated. The latter will play a big role in my monitoring since it will give me idea on which places and people to avoid or which activities usually leads to drinking. The first couple of weeks will be very hard and surely I might go into a lot of eating sessions to forget about it, but I think its worth it. I will be updating you guys on my progress on my war with the bottle. Help me GOD!

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